Three construction workers; an Englishman, an American and an Irishman, sat on the edge of an unfinished skyscraper while eating their lunch.

The Englishman opened his lunchbox and said, "Tuna Fish! If I get Tuna Fish one more time, I'm going to jump!".

Then the American opened his lunchbox and said, "Ham! If I get a ham sandwich one more time, I'm going to jump as well!".

Then the Irishman opened his lunchbox and said, "Peanut Butter! If I get a peanut butter sandwich one more time I'm going to jump, too!"

The next day, the three workers, sat again on the edge of the skyscraper to eat their lunch. The Englishman opened his lunchbox and said,

"Tuna Fish! That's it!" and he jumped off the skyscraper and died.

The American opened his lunchbox and said, "Ham!" and he jumped off the skyscraper and died.

The Irishman opened his lunchbox and said, "Peanut Butter!" and he jumped off the skyscraper and died.

At their funerals the three widows of the construction workers talked together. The English widow cried, "I wish to God I had never made that sandwich!"

The American Widow sobbed, "If only he had told me!"

3 men are caught stealing in Mexico. One is Irish, another Scottish and another English

The Mexicans sentence them to death so next morning they are up before the firing squad.

The English one says 'Mexicans hate natural disasters! If we pretend there is one we can escape while they go and prepare themselves for it!'

So the English man shouts 'HURRICANE!' just before he is to be shot, and all the Mexicans go into hiding and he escapes.

Next up, the Scot shouts 'FLOOD'! and the Mexicans go into hiding again while he escapes.

The Irishman is next and he shouts:-

'FIRE'!